Young apathy movement vows to change world by doing nothing

The coveted voting bloc comprised of 18 to 34 year olds in Utah are joining a nationwide effort to stay at home this election season. In a presidential election that pundits are dubbing the most important election in more than 50 years, the youngest of eligible voters in Utah seem resounding in their determination to keep the status quo by not participating this year.

To counterbalance the efforts of groups such as MTV’s Rock the Vote and P. Diddy’s Vote or Die, Frank Hanson, a 28-year-old legal messenger has recently started a local chapter of the New York City-based, “Young Apathy.” The coalition, largely comprised of young professionals and college students, seeks to inform young potential voters of “why voting sucks” and activities that are more worthwhile than political participation.

“It could basically be anything,” said Hanson, a scruffy World of Warcraft player who has never been a registered voter. “From video games to beer pong to laying on the couch watching “Scrubs” reruns, I guarantee you I’ll have a better time and be a happier person by not investing the physical or mental energy required to cast a ballot.”
Hanson and thousands of others across the nation claim that political awareness only leads to frustration, depression, anxiety and “bad vibes.”

Though the Utah chapter of Young Apathy is only a few days old and has no staff, no office and no organized media efforts, Hanson claims the support is overwhelming.
“I’ve been on message boards, in bars and even went to the University of Utah campus to talk with people about not voting and everyone agrees that they don’t have the time, energy or desire to expend on it.”

Random interviews conducted on the street seem to give credence to Hanson’s assertion.
James Yao, a sophomore at Salt Lake Community College, said he isn’t planning on volunteering for a campaign or voting because, “politicians are scumbags who talk about boring things. I’ll probably just have sex with my girlfriend instead.”

“I just don’t have the inclination anymore,” said Libby Brovlowski, a barista at a downtown Salt Lake City coffee shop. “Voting and caring about the world, it all seemed so cool until I actually tried it. It’s a similar experience to the waiting room at a doctor’s office – a lot of hassle and when you see the results, you feel duped.”

However, there are detractors of the movement. Todd Frampton, a self-described political activist and college student said, “The youth just don’t realize that we can change the world. It’s on us. Bono says so and that guy is so passionate. How can you not listen to him?” He also adds that he’s heard rumors that Young Apathy is actually a scheme of the Republican Party to keep liberal-minded young people from voting Democrat.

Hanson disclaims that notion. “Dude, I don’t even know what Republicans believe in. This isn’t about political parties. It’s about coming together as a group and making a statement by not doing anything. It’s the people who stay home that really change the world – their world. Politics sucks and we’re done letting it affect our lives.”

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